lists: big picture and the details

I was a worrier from the start (as evidence, I present the picture at the top of my blog).  I have been called a planner, a worrier, a type-A personality, a control freak, a natural organizer, an over-thinker, a perfectionist and a detail person.  At different times in my life, I have been all of these things and a few times I've been all these things at once.  All these years later, this is still a part of my nature.

I watch Molly's personality develop, knowing some of her core character is already set, while other aspects will evolve with experience, environment and education.  It makes me reflect further on what are other aspects of my core character.  As cliche as it sounds, being a parent makes me want to be a better person.  It clearly brings into focus those aspects of your self you wish not to impart to your child.  I've learned to be more patient, more present in the moment, more mindful of my actions and words and more aware of the fragility and strength of each day.

I hope Molly learns the value of a list and the delight of a lazy afternoon.  I hope I balance the tasks of keeping a loving and home full of life with a pursuit of fun and friendships.  It has been stated many ways and times that the secret of life is to find the balance between the big picture and details.  “The secret to happiness is to see all marvels of the world, and never to forget the drops of oil in the spoon.”   I keep that at the heart of things moving forward.

Of course, I still have lists.  Some with items that are heartbreaking, challenging and dreadful.  But I know now, that there will be items on those lists from here on out that are joyful, adventurous, fun and sweet.  I've got my spoon and oil and am ready to go.